and she was petting her beer can
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
