my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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