The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
