I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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