Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize