She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
