My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
