Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize