im having a threesome with these popsicles
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize