I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
