Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
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Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
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At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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