No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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