i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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