it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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