apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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