I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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