two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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