You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
