found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
foreskin is a definite game changer
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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