fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
