Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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