How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
