I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Girls should come with a carfax report
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
