i just google imaged poop.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.