summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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