Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize