i just sent this text using only my big toe
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize