Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
