theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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