hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
