She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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