On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I'm always down for nudity.
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