I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
