from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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