it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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