I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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