Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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