She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize