Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
