i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.