So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
