I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
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