i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
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