ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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