All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
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