Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I would fuck him just for his dog
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
