At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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