And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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