I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
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