your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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